Sunday, September 16, 2007

Two plus two equals pretty toenails

Yep! It's true! I swear!

See, people are always asking me where I got my toenails done..."Ooh, you got a pedicure! Really nice! Where'd you go?"

And I say, "My bathroom."

They just can't believe it when I say that I've done it myself. And it drives my mother and sister-in-law crazy (Hi Mom! Hi Tracy!) that I do such a nice job!

It's funny because I'll be feeling sorry for myself that they went out and got a pedicure, but, they're always whining that they wish they could do it themselves! Damn women! Just can't figure out what we want!

Well, so anyway, back to toenails and two and two! It's just funny how I never put two and two together to figure this thing out!

I figured that I was doing such a nice job, because, I'd been a receptionist in a hair/nail salon and I'd watched the girls very closely and paid attention to their technique. And the main thing that I took away from it was that they did not set the brush down at the cuticle! They set the brush down a few centimeters from the cuticle and push the polish down to the cuticle like that. It is basically like coloring inside the lines, and when attempting to freehand it, it just doesn't work.

But even with giving people this advice, they are still extremely unsatisfied with their results. Which has left me confused, as to why I can do a nice job and they cannot.

However, I have always wondered how people who are not limber can possibly do their nails!

Which brings me to this afternoon - I'm on the floor in my room, doing my nails and Mark walks in and exclaims, "Good God! Contortionist!"

And that dear folks, is when the light bulb finally lit up for this dim broad!

It's not just the technique I witnessed the nail girls using! It's my damn limberness!

D'oh 2
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